During the past year I have noticed an increasing number of Internet stories/articles reporting the murders and /or more often murder-suicides wherein a parent has killed the spouse and their children.
Men and fathers are usually the assailants for cases involving a murdered spouse.
Children are usually the victims when mothers commit homicide on members of their immediate families.
The act of any parent or adult killing a child is horrendous.
And yet, as the mother of three daughters, I am most taken when a mother kills her daughter (s).
As a psychotherapist I a to ask, “What drovethe mother to commit this terrible act? What message does this act send? And to whom is the mother speaking? For what is she crying out?”
In that these incidents are on the rise, I ask, “What do these occurrences say about our society?”
On a more personal level I wonder what does the increase in these type of crimes suggest about the physical and mental state of mothers in America?
And what can we mothers and all of American society learn from this?
A recent guest on my blog talk radio show, Book Talk, Creativity and Family Matters, stated that research asserts that a single mother in America who works outside of the home endures on a daily basis the same level of stress as does a combat soldier fighting in Afghanistan.
Although the statement did not shock me, the fact that someone or some person had examined the state of mothers who work outside the home left me stunned.
Exploring the experience of women who are both mothers and who also hold down jobs outside the home is a good thing. Leaders and officials in American need to spend more time and money looking into this dimension of American culture and life.
To exact substantial, effective and permanent change in the life our nation’s economy, not to mention that women comprise 51% of our the country’s work force, you cannot ignore those who not only give birth to children (future workers and innovators,) but provide care and nurturing in the first 18 years of life of those who will become our nation’s future adults.
When I returned home after the birth of our first child and daughter I called the hospital where I had given birth and asked, “How can I tell if my baby is tired?”
I felt sure that a hungry or wet infant would cry. But how to assess fatigue and tiredness left me worrisome.
The nurse with whom I spoke offered great wisdom that I still repeat nearly a quarter of a century later.
She said, “Check in with yourself. Listen to your body. If you’re tired. Your baby is most likely tired. If you’re hungry and need a warm bath and nice dinner. The same most probably holds true for your infant.”
I thanked the nurse and have followed her directions since that time, during which I have given birth to two other children, both daughters.
The information this nurse dispensed addresses all parents and caretakers, either women or men, and matters not whether your infant is a girl or a boy.
Her words address not only the relationship between parent or mother and child.
It also speaks to people in relation to those around them.
As a psychotherapist I recognize and witness the state of one person’s mind and thoughts, influence and affect the unconscious and psyche of those in proximity to them or those individuals with whom an individual has communicated by either telephone or e-mail.
As human researchers advance the development of Internet and computer technology, we uncover and realize the many ways we, all of us, have been and are connected with one another.
On doing so we might find less need for engaging in war. Likewise we might also uncover improved methods of communicating with ourselves, families and those we hold most dear, and ultimately other peoples of the world with whom we must begin to view and interact as fellow global citizens versus our enemies.
The axiom, “When a drop of rain falls in China, we in America get wet,” has taken us full circle to, “The cries of one child enduring the murderous acts of a mother evidence the need for our nation to attend the inner child who lives within us all.”
~~Below this blog post I have listed articles detailing the deaths of children at the hands of their mothers.
I have not researched whether women and mothers are more or less likely than men and fathers to kill their children and spouses and follow with suicide.
As a mother of daughters I have chosen to articles on mother homicide/suicides.
Mother Killed Daughter, 11, in Apparent Murder-Suicide
Mother in Murder-Suicide Grieved Over Late Daughter
Mom Kills Daughters Then Herself In Murder Suicide
Mother who allegedly drowned daughters in court today
Murder-Suicide on the rise nationwide
Kitchener woman in murder-suicide was loving mother, sister says
Indian mother faces trial in Britain for suicide attempt
Mother Lashandra Armstrong kills self, 3 kids by driving van into Hudson River, 1 escapes
Court Upholds Murder Conviction Of Mother Who Killed Young Daughter In Suicide Attempt
Woman Killed Self, 2 Children When She Walked Into Traffic on Interstate
Mother kills daughters in murder-suicide
Mom sends husband on errand… then ‘shoots her father, 10-year-old daughter and herself in shotgun horror’
The Trial of Fumiko Kimura ~~MOM KILLS KIDS AND SELF
Neighbor sees mother kill child in Downstate murder-suicide that leaves 5 dead
Mom who allegedly killed daughter said they had a death pact
Mother Kills 3 Children, Herself at Resort Condo
Mother kills children in murder-suicide
Wake Held for Mom, 4 Kids Killed in S.I. Murder-Suicide
Tulsa Police ID Mother And Daughter In Murder-Suicide
Howrey Associate Killed in Apparent Murder-Suicide
Hong Kong: Parent-Child Suicides Are Rising
Texas Mayor and Daughter: Newest Case of Parental Murder-Suicide
Police: Mom survives attempted suicide; accused of killing 8 yr. old disabled daughter
Mother’s Murder/Suicide Letter
Dying mother describes fiery murder-suicide
Pregnant Woman’s Failed Suicide Shouldn’t Earn Her a Murder Charge
Mom, Daughter Died in Murder-Suicide: Coroner
Ohio woman who killed self, kids, history of mental illness
Mom denied food stamps shoots kids, kills self
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