Squidoo

85 Years and Counting II: Marriage, Vulnerability, and A Need for the Other

85 Years and Counting II:
Marriage, Vulnerability, and A Need for the Other

As a psychotherapist who earned my MA in Psychology from The California Institute of Integral Studies, in San Francisco, I see beauty and importance in all religions and faiths–Christianity, Taoism, Ile Ife, Hinduism, Sikhism, Buddhism, Islam, Jainism, Native American teachings, Yoruban Cosmology, Voudon, etc.

The religious texts and teachings of each make significant contributions towards the spiritual development and evolution of individuals and humanity. I subscribe to Carl Jung’s axiom that religions as intricate psychological systems the humans used to meet the daily task of coping with life’s uncertainty and travails. Like Deepak Chopra advises, I encourage each individual to choose what religion best fits her or his personality.

In this vein I view the institution of marriage, whatever the culture of socio-economic strata, spiritual/religious belief or the lack thereof, as raising the issue of human vulnerability.

As humans we are social beings.

We need human connection. …

Read the rest @ my new Squidcast
…where the pain of family meets a change of heart…and compassion…

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85 Years and Counting: Commitment in an Age of Immediacy and Dispensability

85 Years and Counting
Commitment in an Age of Immediacy and Dispensability

Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher

The words “…After 85 years, husband and wife say…” caught my attention, and immediately I was reading of Herbert and Zelmyra Fisher, wed for nearly 8.5 decades.

Many people do not live that long, never mind businesses. That a union of two people could endure nearly 9 decades of connection and commitment is amazing. That it is a marriage and one in America proves nothing short of miraculous.

Each day individuals in our society of Facebook accounts, instant messaging and Tweets of 140 chars (short, for characters or letters) exit relationships of all kinds by penning their signature, or with the click of a button remove and/or block a previous association or connection on a social network, or by simply forwarding an e-mail or text message.

Dispensability and disposability has gone global, electronic, and immediate. …

Read the rest @ my new Squidcast

…where the pain of family meets a change of heart…and compassion…

85 Years and Counting: Commitment in an Age of Immediacy and Dispensability Read More »

Marriage, Zelmyra and Herbert Fisher, and Squidoo…

As if I haven’t been blogging enough I recently opened a 3rd Squidoo lense–…where the pain of family meets compassion…and a change of heart…

An author of Women’s Fiction centered on wives, and husbands trying to make it work, and succeeding, I felt the need to share my insights and discoveries about the institution of which I have participated for nearly 3 decades.

Thirty years at this , I recently uncovered, is nothing compared to Zelmyra and Herbert Fisher of North Carolina, who hold the Guinness Book of World Records for the couple with the longest years of wedlock.

Marriage, Zelmyra and Herbert Fisher, and Squidoo… Read More »

For Richer, For Poorer II: Emotions, Money, and Marriage in America

For Richer, For Poorer II
Emotions, Money and Marriage in America

Marriage Penalty crop

An award-winning, nationally-syndicated personal finance columnist, Liz Pulliam Weston writes:

* The median net worth of married-couple households in the latest Census Bureau wealth study, conducted in 2002, was $101,975. For single men, median wealth was $23,700. For single women, $20,217.

* A 15-year study of 9,000 people found that during that time, people who married and stayed married built up nearly twice the net worth of people who stayed single. …when…other factors are held constant…income and education…the fact that they were married contributed to a 4% annual rise in these couples’ wealth.

* Wealth declines typically started four years before a divorce was final…the breakup ultimately reduced the typical person’s net worth by 77% of that of the average single person.

According to Nielsen//NetRatings, Liz Pulliam is the most-read personal finance columnist on the Internet.

Most of us grew up in a home controlled by adults. The attitudes about money that those adults hold, whether we like or disagree with them, shape our lives. Inevitably they shape how we see ourselves, and ultimately how we perceive our place in the world.

Individuals who grow up in a home where one or both parents donate a lot of time to their job, career or profession and making money, whether out of necessity or because they love their work, will view money quite differently than those who come from a home where money is viewed as simply important for acquiring the things one needs to live healthily and joyfully.

Two spouses of a marriage who come from the same economic strata could hold quite different views on this matter.

One spouse may view living joyfully and

For Richer, For Poorer II: Emotions, Money, and Marriage in America Read More »

For Richer, For Poorer II: Emotions, Money, and Marriage in America

For Richer, For Poorer II
Emotions, Money and Marriage in America

Marriage Penalty crop

An award-winning, nationally-syndicated personal finance columnist, Liz Pulliam Weston writes:

* The median net worth of married-couple households in the latest Census Bureau wealth study, conducted in 2002, was $101,975. For single men, median wealth was $23,700. For single women, $20,217.

* A 15-year study of 9,000 people found that during that time, people who married and stayed married built up nearly twice the net worth of people who stayed single. …when…other factors are held constant…income and education…the fact that they were married contributed to a 4% annual rise in these couples’ wealth.

* Wealth declines typically started four years before a divorce was final…the breakup ultimately reduced the typical person’s net worth by 77% of that of the average single person.

According to Nielsen//NetRatings, Liz Pulliam is the most-read personal finance columnist on the Internet.

Most of us grew up in a home controlled by adults. The attitudes about money that those adults hold, whether we like or disagree with them, shape our lives. Inevitably they shape how we see ourselves, and ultimately how we perceive our place in the world.

Individuals who grow up in a home where one or both parents donate a lot of time to their job, career or profession and making money, whether out of necessity or because they love their work, will view money quite differently than those who come from a home where money is viewed as simply important for acquiring the things one needs to live healthily and joyfully.

Two spouses of a marriage who come from the same economic strata could hold quite different views on this matter.

One spouse may view living joyfully and healthily to include spending money frugally, and contributing time to less expensive ventures.

Checkout my new Squidcast @

…where the pain of family meets a change of heart…and compassion…

For Richer, For Poorer II: Emotions, Money, and Marriage in America Read More »

For Richer, For Poorer: Money, Freedom, and the American Marriage

For Richer, For Poorer
Money, Freedom, and the American Marriage

Marriage money

An award-winning, nationally-syndicated personal finance columnist, Liz Pulliam Weston writes:

* The median net worth of married-couple households in the latest Census Bureau wealth study, conducted in 2002, was $101,975. For single men, median wealth was $23,700. For single women, $20,217.

* A 15-year study of 9,000 people found that during that time, people who married and stayed married built up nearly twice the net worth of people who stayed single. …when…other factors are held constant…income and education…the fact that they were married contributed to a 4% annual rise in these couples’ wealth.

* Wealth declines typically started four years before a divorce was final…the breakup ultimately reduced the typical person’s net worth by 77% of that of the average single person.

According to Nielsen//NetRatings, Liz Pulliam is the most-read personal finance columnist on the Internet.

Checkout my new Squidcast @

…where the pain of family meets a change of heart…and compassion…

For Richer, For Poorer: Money, Freedom, and the American Marriage Read More »

More Than Silver and Gold: Men, Divorce and Suicide

More Than Silver and Gold
Men, Divorce and Suicide

“American men are four times more likely than women to take their own lives. It’s a troubling phenomenon, rooted in such factors as genetics, upbringing and even career choice. But a growing body of research suggests that divorce is one of the major culprits in suicides among adult males.” –Katie Drummond, Suicide Rate Greater Among Divorced Men, Research Finds, Aol.news (March 10, 2010)

Checkout my new Squidcast @

…where the pain of family meets a change of heart…and compassion…

More Than Silver and Gold: Men, Divorce and Suicide Read More »